So, I can't help it...I have to put together my list of All the Reasons Why I Can't Stand Rachel Ray. (sorry Sassy S)
- I just don't believe these meals actually take 30 minutes to create! The only thing I give her is that does all her own chopping, but so do Jamie Oliver and Giada De Laurentiis. It's just that Rachel is always so frantic by the end of the show - I feel like I have to get up and pace.
- EVOO and GB - seriously. This woman has so little time in her show that she feels she can't articulate the words "extra virgin olive oil" and "garbage bowl"? Spare me.
- Why does she insist on carrying all the shit in one big pile that's about to fall over at any second? God, how annoying. I realize it's "her thing" but it's weak. Just sayin'.
- I hate to criticize something she has no control over, but her hands are MASSIVE. Every time she handles a wee tender cherry tomato or little garlic clove I shudder to think of what might happen.
- Every episode - and I mean every episode - she's left with at LEAST three pots and pans. God - who the hell wants to clean up all that crap?! When was the last time you ran more than two burners on your stove?
- At the end of her show, as she's frantically trying to finish off her meal, she always slops the food down quickly and haphazardly on a plate - I've even seen her drop bits of mashed potato or whatever all over the counter she's so panicked to get it done. But I guess when you're trying to squeeze in a meal that takes more like 45 minutes to make into a 30 minute show.....
*Now that I'm laid off and bumming around - I know that Rachel Ray and that annoying bleach blonde guy are on between 1:00 a nd 2:00 every weekday. At least they put those two together and get them over with.
**I don't use the lemon juice or make the parsley salad. Plus, if you are cooking for one, just use three eggs, one chorizo sausage link and one potato. Also, make sure your pan doesn't have a plastic handle if you are putting it into the oven.
5 comments:
This is an awesome post! I have to tell Chantoon as she shares your hate for giant hands.
I've never told anyone this story, but I went to Tim Horton's one day and the guy preparing my sandwich looked at me and said "do you watch Rachel Ray?"
"OMG" I thought...."he's going to tell me I look like her. The Horror!"
"Uh yes" I said in my most unimpressed voice.
"I love that show he said". Hmmm I couldn't tell if he decided not to tell me because I clearly hated her or what. I'm hoping I imagined the whole thing.
I know little about Rachel Ray, since cable was turned off long ago in my house. But, I always get these black cat, Friday the 13th feelings about people, and she screams useless. As in, useless to the greater world useless. Kinda like Mariah Carey useless. Yeah, that's all I got.
i have watched her show, sometimes the entire thing and sit there wondering some of the things you have... to be honest, she has grown on me a little (i can respect her 'laissez faire' attitude in comparison to watching martha stewart where everything is just perfect - while she is bagging her dog's shit. ha
but yeah, my god, the size of her hands!!! totally recalls the seinfeld episode... you know the one?
chantoon.
I've never seen Rachel Ray's show, but now I want to see it! Haha!
You are hillarious!! Actually i was off on Monday and i watched RR...I actually am starting to see it you're way....Seriously! I was actually getting annoyed with her voice so i muted the TV and put on David Gray music in the background...Awe peace and quiet.
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